Sharing stories and experiences to help with our suicide prevention research

Sharing stories and experiences to help with our suicide prevention research

I had never considered myself as a person with a learning disability, it’s just the way it has always been.  At 60 I still struggle to spell even short words, like how many "L's" are there in "really" gets me every day.

So education in the 60's was a painful process and quite damaging as it just highlighted all the things I couldn’t do.

I was pretty sure I was reasonably intelligent but just couldn’t fathom why things like spelling and reading eluded me and was so easy for my classmates.

The school did have a word for my struggles  "laziness"! being the most common. Yet to me it felt like climbing a mountain everyday.

I left school having failed completely when it came to exams. The fall out was that in my teens I discovered drugs. To cut a long story short I was unaware of why drugs were so attractive to me, I couldn't help myself and things escalated ... I was injecting for 5 years.

When finally I started to see what a mess I was in (some years after those around me had), I found myself sitting on a window ledge 3 floors up feeling desperately miserable, trapped and lonely as I watched the people next door (who I didn’t know so wasn’t invited) prepare for a party in their garden.

I am soooo lucky! there was a phone nearby and self preservation kicked in so I rang the Samaritans and we TALKED, but for many they may be beyond that point of self preservation, engulfed in a downward spiral. Its so hard to stand back and realise what’s happening to you enough to recognise the seriousness of these feelings and do something about it.

For a person with a learning disability it may be all the harder for them to make sense of these feelings and express themselves.

Although I knew nothing of dyslexia I did discover the visual and creative world was the place for me, it played to my strengths, scratching my creative itch in a positive way, so I was very lucky young man. 

A Happy Ending

With hindsight my call for help was also the moment when my life changed direction in a good way.

I've been a video director and photographer for some 35 years now. Which in a strange way brings me full circle as I am now about to help create suicide prevention tool for people with a learning disability.

This is where you come in, I need your help to better understand the people we want to help and how best to communicate to them in a language everyone and anyone involved understands.

There is a considerable amount of academic work and research in this area, which is not only very hard for me to assimilate as its so technical but also it doesn’t give me the insight into the "heads hearts and minds" of the carers, families, friends and support workers in the lives of those who have felt suicidal.

The suicide prevention tools we are working on are for people with a learning disability and the people in their lives. As a director I learn by talking to people, asking questions and getting their personal insights and reflections so I really get a feel for what's in their heads hearts and minds. That is the key to making these tools effective, real world input.

What I am looking for?  it's people’s first hand accounts and experiences around the topic of suicide, suicidal thoughts, changes in behaviour, triggers, warning signs, solutions, personal strategies etc. In fact anything you feel might help us better understand this challenging subject from a 360 degree perspective.

It could be in any form, a blog and email, an offer to chat or to answer questions. Anonymity and confidentiality is a given, people can always get a friend to send us something.

Grassroots is the Brighton based suicide prevention charity who have already won the funding for this important work and it’s them you should touch base with please if you have a story, experience or a reflection you would be happy for us to learn from.  

Chris Brown, a director at Grassroots is the person to contact, she is often out training and doing amazing things to grow the charity and get the message out  so usually best to email her at Grassroots
chris@prevent-suicide.org.uk 

Please say if you wish to be anonymous its not problem, the important thing is to send us your experiences, so it's part our research process and knowledge base as we develop the tools.

We are intending to create some surveys soon too so that the information gathered is structured as Chris tells me there are some gaps in this kind of research data. It may also become a very useful resource for anyone who is part of a persons life who has learning disabilities and has concerns around suicide.

A key part of our strategy is to help facilitate the all important conversation, so the tools will be very accessible for all, relying a lot a "See and Hear" approach not text as in Easy Read.

If you want to learn more about the visual language we will be using as part of the toolkit then have a read of my blog. http://tinyurl.com/b8twhhy

To learn more about the great work at Grassroots:

Website www.prevent-suicide.org.uk
   Facebook http://bit.ly/Grassface
  Twitter http://bit.ly/GrassTwit
  Blog http://bit.ly/Grassblog
  YouTube http://bit.ly/GrassTube
 

Grassroots Suicide Prevention is a registered charity number 1149873 and a company limited by guarantee 5687263.

If you want to contact me:

jon.bryant@btclick.com @Chicustard on Twitter.

Standing back and looking in

I like not knowing what I can’t do….

Copyright Jon Bryant 2013

In at the Deep End

So let me boldly go, not knowing what I can’t do and offer “an outsiders” uneducated view of how communication passports might work….note to self … not your strongest sell so far Jon! That said I do place great value on “the novice mind” so there is an outside chance I won’t need an orthopaedic surgeon to remove feet from mouth, sure you will tell me if I do

A fully Qualified Novice.

One of the pleasures of being a video director is the way one gets parachuted into new areas and subjects that you know nothing about, you have a short time to absorb a great deal and then deliver solution to a totally new audience. I imagine that in some ways this is very similar for LD Nurses with each new patient.

The Joy of Tweet.

I joined in on a recent #LDnursechat the topic was communication passports and as it's been suggested by LD professionals that my visual language could play a “powerful role” in this area, things have been fermenting ever since (odour free I promise).

The History bit in 138 words… a lucky escape!

Some years ago I created a visual language for people with a learning disability with, as usual:) no previous experience of the subject or the audience. This is the story of how it first got started http://tinyurl.com/b8twhhy  Converting a 43 page legal document into pictures and simple language was not the easiest “first place” to start, but a look will help make better sense of what follows.

Didn’t expect this to happen.

Since I first mentioned it on Twitter in January this year I have had almost 1000 hits on the blog and to my surprise and delight the professionals, academics and experts in the field of Learning Disability have given me great feedback and support. This has lead to several meaningful projects, helping a hospital make its POVA services accessible to the very people they are reaching out to.

I am also delighted to have been approached to collaborate on creating a Suicide Prevention tool for a Brighton based organisation. Another very rewarding project is helping a national advocacy create a tool for parents with LD and Family Court staff including the security staff and judges. Its key role is to make the process easier to understand and less intimidating for parents with a learning disability or intellectual impairment when attending the family courts. This is where the future of their children may be being decided and they need to “make their case”.


Am I over simplifying things?…I rather hope so.



Would it work if we had 50 signing languages for the deaf?

Obviously not, one of the themes I picked up on from the #LDnursechat is a lack of consistency, there seemed to be local/regional differences in the format and content of communications passports around the UK.

If you are giving a blind person directions…it's pointless pointing.

Communication is a two way affair. One essential role of communications passports I would have thought is the ability to help both parties understand each others needs and provide a common language to facilitate this. It’s vital for good outcomes that both patient and the hospital staff communicate effectively.

Takes 2 2 Tango and 2 2 Communicate...          
A catch 22?

The lack of standardisation and awareness dilutes the effectiveness of communications passports. Sometimes they are not even looked at, apparently. Trying to raise awareness of something that comes in multiple forms can only be targeted with a scatter gun approach and as a consequence its effectiveness is hugely diluted. Selling a single proposition is always a much easier process, more cost effective and more sustainable. It's not like we have a different driving license & tax disc for each County we pass through, or when on-line every form is different depending on where you live! I have spent all my working life raising awareness so it is part of my solution.

He’s put that hat back on!

With my novice hat firmly in place I may at this point enter the foot in mouth zone. My knowledge of what is already in use re passports is to be honest, sparse, so I'm putting my hands up to that now. Being non medical it’s not that easy to get sight of current passports. Therefore I'm hoping to substitute my lack of knowledge with what I hope is common sense.

Out comes the Directors Hat next.

Looking from the outside in, the first thing that seems“logical” is to harvest as many variations of pre existing communications passports along with feedback on what works, what doesn’t and also a “wish lists” from all sides.

I never mind being called “Big Ears”.

The critical thing is to listen in equal measure to passport holders themselves and their carers/family and on the medical side, HCA’s, LD Nurses, Dr's and Consultants. My focus will always be on the users shaping the final output, only they know what works in the real world. The objective being to distill all the “good practice” from the cocktail of current solutions that is in use across the UK at present.

When hurdling don’t forget your vest!

I realise the vested interests in peoples own version of the communication passport is the biggest hurdle to overcome if my solution is to become a reality. This asks a fundamental question “what is best for LD people and more widely the NHS?" It would be a great shame if the reason a project like this stalls is because people don’t really want to act as a team with one goal in favour of retaining their version of the comms passport. So I have a plan B, that’s my job - bet you didn’t see the producers hat go on:)

Plugging my Plug-in Bolt-on Standalone

It would be possible to keep your vest on and still join in the game... I see the visual language as being a powerful plug in or bolt on to pre existing communications passports, providing the additional communication tool to enhance the many interactions that are part of being a patient in hospital.

Like the Family Courts project with the Dudley Advocacy this aspect of the work is about helping prepare for the daunting ,and making the unfamiliar a bit more familiar before the event. I can see the visual language tool being very effective in this role.

Just getting my other foot ready now:)

I am pretty sure that much of what currently exists is in written form, and while it’s designed to provide a “profile” of the person and information about them, aspects of their personality, abilities and limitations, preferences etc, I wonder how helpful these passports are in enhancing the frequent communications that relate to a stay in hospital for a person with LD and those interacting with them
? It is this role that I want to expand on next.

Pick a card... Any card you like.

When I first mentioned my ideas around this I was rather firmly put in my place on Twitter, “and just how did I expect to train all the people like LD nurses to use it?” Call me radical…though I prefer Jon, but if my vision for this works for the passport holder with a learning disability or perhaps brain injury then it should require no training for staff to use it anyway.

The concept is simple, naturally:) To help an LD patient express their needs and feelings to strangers(staff) in an unfamiliar place (hospital), they bring with them a set of cards that are about playing card size.

It’s a game of 2 halves.

On one side is an image that the person with LD understands to have a specific meaning. You will have seen the sort of images I make from the visual tenancy project. The back of the card could be pre printed with a written explanation on it so that anyone shown a card simply has to read it to know what it means. So as promised no training required.

Its OK to take sides

The reverse of the card could also be blank, this means that staff or carers can write down what this card means to that person…. "I feel sick; I am a bit scared; can I have a drink?; can you take me to the toilet?; I like tea not coffee; are you a doctor?"  Or "my bed is wet; can I get up for a walk?; thank you; I feel better now; I have a headache; mine's a vodka! ;can I play football here?; What time does the party start?"

I do actually think humour should be part of the mix, the LD people I worked with when creating the visual language all “got” humour and its value should not be overlooked in a hospital setting and what it does to improve communication and a sense of well being.

By working with both LD people, their carers and staff, the archive of images will build up based on what is proven to work. Those involved in interacting with the person, HCA’s and LD especially will from their years of cumulative experience be able to identify the 20 or 30 most common communication problems very quickly I am sure. This is gold dust for me.

The Pig and the Monkey

My role will to be that of “piggy in the middle/translator” listening to both users and providers to create a“vocabulary” that bridges the communications gaps they identify. I will be setting up a survey monkey so I can get that list of communications issues from everyone’s perspective.

Future proof… no Tardis required

If I could now ask you to now install your imagination app and jump in my Tardis… after wobbly visual effect and suitable radio phonic soundtrack you arrive with a carer and person with learning disability preparing for a stay in hospital.

They use a cloud based app to access and download images from the Visual Language resource. These are then loaded on to a smart phone or tablet or printed out. There are also a series of clips aimed at gently explaining what going into hospital will involve for the person with LD and their carers. The hospital also has a set of images available on the ward that they can use to help them communicate in a non verbal way with anyone. They are laminated plastic so reusable and hygienic.

Rides off into sunset on white horse…no hat this time.

The Nirvana of this concept would be that over time the archive grows to cover all aspects of independent living for LD people ,enhancing communications for both them and care and support services, for better quality of life.  In time, like road signs, the images become standardised and universally used and understood like signing for the deaf and braille for the visually impaired.

Less process more action, did someone say “action?”

This could be created and delivered very easily, it doesn’t need endless meetings and committees, external consultants, why?  All the expertise is out there now held by people like you, and its about me listening and responding creatively. What do you want to say and who do you want to say it to? 

Scaleable Start

What I am suggesting is completely scalable so one would start with a one ward pilot, getting input from everyone. When it feels like the concept is refined, then role out a little wider and listen and learn, adapt and modify all the time.

Organic is good for you

The critical thing is that it needs to evolve organically, ward by ward, hospital by hospital, user by user. Trying to go the route the NHS prefers e.g. come up with all the solutions before implementation, spend years in consultation, testing and research, is pointless and will be wasteful and disproportionate. With the right support this could be up and running in 3 months at a ward near you.

Buddy can you spare a dime?

To get the ball rolling this just needs funding and support from one phase to the next, so there is minimal risk to the NHS or charities involving themselves in it as it grows in well managed stages. When critical mass is achieved, the evidence base is there and then that's the time to roll it out more widely. Like all resources of any real value it will expand and change to meet demand over time.

Simple peeps!

The cost of the research, creating the images, the cards and the apps is insignificant, in creative and production terms it’s not complex at all and would represent a few months work with a small team. This project is purely about communication and that’s what I have done for 35 years, there is no huge changeover, re training, or new working methods to implement or overcome. 

Did I mention Simple and Cost Effective Awareness Raising and Training?

As to training and awareness raising across the NHS, "If a patient shows you a card with an image on and you are unsure of what they mean just read what is written on the back" ....so that's the training session over....only took 5 seconds and 27 words....Job Done! ...or have I over simplified things?

999

Do I need that surgeon I wonder?

I would love to get a small representative group together, comprising LD people and their carers, especially LD nurses and also relevant charities and organisations to give me their input and see if we can get this to a pilot stage.

I am sure I have bitten of a few more toenails than I can chew so please put me right via jon.bryant@btclick.com or @Chicustard on twitter.

I am on a bit of a mission to make this work and hungry to learn more so got my big ears on, not decided about the hat though:)  

Thanks for reading.

Jon

jon.bryant@btclick.com

About Jon    http://tinyurl.com/bxtp7bx

M 07831 832 439  

Copyright Jon Bryant 2013

Developing a generic version of the Visual Tenancy Agreement

  Working together… 

A proposition for Housing Associations

COPYRIGHT JON BRYANT 2013

 

I have a simple proposition for a small group of Housing Associations to work together and help me create a generic Visual Language version of  tenancy agreements. In return I will provide each association with a fully branded version for distribution via DVD, USB sticks & the web, images for print and web pages and DVD media at virtually cost price. This includes a licence for life and updates.  

 

What needs doing...

The pictures that make up the visual tenancy agreement DVD are complimented by a very simple “Plain English” narrative and designed to work for all audiences. If you have a look at this blog you can see a good selection of the imagery I have created and the thinking behind it. http://tinyurl.com/b8twhhy

Originally made and tested with input from supported living tenants it now has the endorsement of many influential professionals in Learning Disability so I can be 100% confident that it will meet the needs of supported living tenants. The way I designed it also means it also works for all your general needs tenants as well, so its perfect for induction and also for existing tenants where you may wish to reinforce understanding of the terms of their agreement. 

I have had tenants contact me on Twitter requesting DVD’s to take to their landlords because they found it so helpful in making the complex easy to grasp.

I won’t tell…

If you can honestly say you understand the legalise found in every  set of terms and conditions, insurance policies and agreements we all have to sign up to you are in a very small minority.

Even when tenancy agreements are simplified many are still text based, a very long list of “You must not”. This is not a perfect solution for all of your tenants who may have low literacy problems for whatever reason.

However by providing tenants with both your written agreement and a visual version ensures that they fully understand every aspect of their tenancy from day 1 leading to improved compliance and helping avoid potentially costly interventions. Its also very welcoming, your new land lord has gone the extra mile for you to make things easier to understand.

 

The History

As it was made some years ago for Origin Housing but it  now needs to be taken apart and rebuilt to create an up to date “ un branded and generic version”. By re creating it in modular form I can then bespoke the design of the pages and menus easily and cost effectively, so if you update your corporate branding or merge its quick and easy to update.   

Platforms for delivering media have changed considerably with the cloud and apps and intranets now common so I also want to make it future proof and app friendly.

To do this properly there is a good deal of research to be done to ensure the content of the new generic version matches everyone’s requirements. In order to achieve the above “up grade” it’s quite a complex and time consuming task and I am looking for support. 

 

The Deal
 

 My solution is to get 5 or 6 Housing Associations “Working Together” and in return for this support the discounts on DVD’s and licences guarantee a return on the investment and savings year on year.  By getting a group of you to work together I hope to mitigate any housing associations concerns about “perceived risk and exposure” as you are working together. 

Put simply in return for a contribution towards development and production I offer the following deal to ensure your investment in the development is re payed "with profits". We can fine tune this offer around your needs.  

 

      1)    Heavily discounted License fee, one off payment then free for life.

2)    DVD’s at virtually cost price for the next 5 years

3)    All the images in print ready format and optimised for the web

4)    A version of the visual tenancy agreement you can both host and copy to media such as USB sticks (these can be branded)

5)    Finally I will brand your version of the tool, normally a chargeable addition, so it follows your corporate identity guide.

 

 

 

 

Mitigating Your Exposure
Funding can be held anywhere I am not expecting anyone to place the full amount with me. I would see staged payments with agreed milestones I can evidence as the most practical way forwards.

 

References and Testimonials
I have done over £100,000 of work for Skills for Care, £40,000 with Origin Housing and worked with Thames Water for a decade on much of their internal and external communications. I am old school my reputation and my work are all I have ever used to promote myself. 

Summary

In exchange for supporting me to make a generic version I can make available to others I am repaying that investment very generously through discounts so there really is something tangible in it for you year on year.

I already have two Associations on board, bpha and Erimus but to do this project justice I am still looking for 3 or 4 others to join the “club”. I will be encouraging the housing associations to work together, getting your tenants involved to help me shape the final product.

Interested to know a bit more, would like me to send you a DVD?

Call me, Jon Bryant on 07831 832 439 or email me jon.bryant@btclick.com  
 Twiter @Chicustard 

COPYRIGHT JON BRYANT 2013

Behind a simple concept is a broader vision

Behind a simple concept is a broader vision that can benefit so many & provide an income for charities.
Copyright Jon Bryant 2013 

So what am I looking for?

My lone voice even with my directors hat on lacks the influence required for this project, it needs organisations or groups to work together to get behind the project acting if you like as project champions in their particular sector be it housing, mental health, advocacy, rehabilitation, life skills learning disability etc.   

I am in discussions with several national charities to make specific tools for their needs and also to then make it available for purchase, thus creating a revenue stream. As the visual language is a non verbal form of communication language is not a barrier, therefore the opportunities for those who get behind it are  not just limited to the UK regards sales. 

Because of the considerable endorsement/validation from the mental health professionals who want to use it for their work I now feel completely confident that what I have created is fit for purpose in the housing sector. It also means that anything new I produce will benefit from their expertise, input and their full endorsement.

 My Vision for the Tenancy Agreement

If you havn't seen how a 43 page legal tenancy looks in my visual language here you are:   http://tinyurl.com/b8twhhy

Any individual housing group or association producing their own version needs deep pockets to do a proper job and many are far too small anyway. I try to make every project I work on a benchmark, by which others are judged in that particular sector, it’s always been a good creative driver for me.

 Concept for Housing

The logical way forwards as I always see it is… Rather than individual housing organisations spending valuable resources to produce their own version, if they for example got together and created a central pot to fund a generic version e.g. unbranded and not site specific, this would tick lots of boxes. Everyone needs to understand their tenancy agreement and this would ensure that.

It has a “benevolent” aspect to it as well as it would mean that even the smallest players in the housing sectors could then access an off the shelf solution at a price they could afford, it also raises ability for the sector to meet their equality and diversity objectives.

There are a lot of housing people out there! So given the volume for a very small outlay landlords are actually getting all the benefits of a £17k project to ensure their tenants understand their rights and responsibilities.

The version you may have seen is designed to work on any platform, I am also looking to create and app.

 Different Options for the Housing Sector

For the slightly bigger players or any that want it, I could offer a simple “branded” but not personalised version, where we “badge it” as you see TV channels do it, usually top right of screen.

Take the branding forwards to next level, I could modify the menus and intro etc. to reflect their corporate design manual  and their organisation but essentially nothing else changes.

The final level/option is to change all the backgrounds so they are now shots that show an organisation’s own properties.  I designed the project to make this possible without too much effort, so that contains the costs for the future.

All of the above use the generic version as the "base metal" and as I have worked with brands like Pepsi, RayBan, Porche, VW, BT, Halifax NHBC etc. I have a good working knowledge of brand identity and design matters. 

 Logical Next Steps

Having invested so much time and love in this project and having been of work for 18 months with now resolved health matters, yippee:)  I can’t afford to personally fund the next and very important step. I need to communicate with as many different landlords from across the country as I can in order to identify exactly what needs to go in to the final generic version. It can all be done on-line so costs will be sensible but absolutely vital we meet everyone’s needs.

Once that is done I will need to fund the re design of the generic graphics to ensure a good long shelf life of circa 10 years I can then produce it in all the useful formats for all platforms.

As I have other business interests I would need take a “royalty” on sales and mentor a start up rather than become bogged down with repetitive production work which is not my thing these days. I am very drawn to creating work and training opportunities for people especially with learning disabilities if the chance arises.

Summary 

The visual language will continue to be developed as it has a role in communicating so many things. I am in discussions on the mental health side re making image cards that people with learning difficulties or any form of verbal communication can select and prepare to take with them to hospital to help tell staff of their needs. It even works for simple tasks like shopping so I intend to build up a library over time.

I know it is a big ambition but to me its just common sense and elegant because everyone wins and I do mean everyone!

My Personal Pitch

I have a very broad skills set and solid track record in comms and video production so forgive the cross sell but I am up for anything that’s going right now. Here is a page about my background,  
http://tinyurl.com/d7z6mur I also create 3D modelling and have developed some very clever software for asset management in housing sectors, it's on trial with the Environment Agency currently but I would be delighted to demo it for anyone who is interested.

Copyright Jon Bryant 2013

Off with the Birds

It wasn't till my forties that I began to notice, I mean properly notice the birds in my garden. It had always been nice to see and hear them but I never had what I can best describe as "relationship" with them.

Its very simple; you feed them and like twitter they follow you. What I have noticed is that it quickly becomes part of your routine, you begin to care about them. Their needs are so simple. In time you get regular individuals appearing and this is an account of my having what I think is a remarkable relationship with my blackbirds.

The point of my blog is to suggest that both you and and the person you care for might find this a rewarding pursuit. I think it's another tool in the tool kit regards loneliness and also with conditions like dementia as its "real time" pleasure, it also gives you both things to talk about as they happen.

It must be about 8 years ago when I came back from a days fishing and still had some bait left, sorry for the squeamish reader but they were maggots. As I off loaded my fishing gear I left them on the window sill, and forgot about them. When I remembered the following morning and looked at least half of them disappeared.

So I put the open bait box on the ground and placed a small video camera by it, set it to record and went in doors. Within a few minutes a head popped out of the honeysuckle bush, then in that cute way she cocked her head sideways to study the bait box, and 20 seconds later she was tucking in.

The bush she had emerged from was to the left of my front door and you almost brushed past it as you left or entered the house, at just over 5 feet in height there was a gap in the foliage with 3 blue eggs sitting in a perfectly constructed nest.

I went to the pet shop and got some meal worms, and over the following days I would chuck a few on the path and whistle, always the same tune. It only took a few days for her to cotton on to the routine. I would whistle and where ever she was, over the road, in the park, or on the nest, she would come.

Blackbirds are very territorial but she did allow one other, a male to come into the garden, I soon realised this was Dad and within few more days he would also come to my call. At the same time a robin got in on the act and was initially much bolder than the pair of blackbirds.

Then we had babies:).  I could stand 18 inches from the nest and look at three gaping yellow mouths and mum was never put off by this. I could tell Dad apart from the male blackbirds because he had an odd grey feather (which is rather like the tip of a black cat tail being white), it was a little genetic trait, not age.

This presented a new challenge, mum and dad were feeding 3 insatiable kids, so when I put worms down they would cram as many of them in their beaks as possible. The challenge was to put the right amount of worms down, it's in their instinct to hoover up all feeding opportunities, they are the Labrador of the bird world:). This drive would mean that once they had about 8 to 10 worms in their beak each time they tried to pick up another one, one or two would escape. It was painful to watch, and also very funny but would take far too long so 8 at a time was the best way to get the grub into the babies fast to give them a head start.

It was an extremely hot summer and they were nesting on a south facing wall, so on a couple of the worse days 30C plus I will admit to putting a fan out by the bush to keep the chicks cool. It wasn't long before they fledged and were following mum or dad for food and shouting for more, so they very quickly got used to me and were perfectly happy to come within a foot of my shoes and feed.

It was around then that I began to notice the male copying my whistle in his song, and over time he would use that as a way to call me when he wanted food in the morning. The drawback was he would sit in the tree opposite the bedroom and sing his socks off at 4 am. But in the evening his mellifluous song from the chimney to was just a delight. 

I came home one lunchtime and saw Mrs blackbird spreadeagled on my doormat, she looked injured.....  She was sunbathing and so were the kids. I had never seen them do that but was chuffed they felt so safe in my front garden that they could do that.

As time went on I saw we had two females and one male, and he had the same flash of a grey feather on his side. Over that summer I used to open the front door just to get some air movement and coming down the stairs I saw mum had come inside, clearly looking for a snack. One one occasion she found her way in to the front room. No panic when I arrived I just opened the window, made sure she saw me put some food on the sill and when she was ready she left. 

I saw her and her family through the winter and one of things I had noticed is they would seem my car arrive and fly over to meet me, they 100% recognise cars, and people. If other people went to the front door they would ignore them, as soon I turned up however they would fly down to greet me and demand meal worms. It got to the point where I had to step over them :) they also befriended our post man. If I was taking my dog out they would quite happily stand underneath her, completely unphased.

Black birds don't live for ever anyway, and they had a dangerous habit of flying from the park across the road to the house just a few feet off the ground which always worried me if I called them.

I came home one day to find Mrs blackbird very injured but alive a few doors up. I couldn't bring myself to do anything, so had to walk away and remind myself that nature is nature and in this case there was nothing I could do. Some how she made it to my garden and I found her dead at my gate, so poignant. I still well up now:)

As we both need cheering up here is the amazing thing: each year blackbirds would appear, quite fearless of me and feed. I changed my car and in a few weeks they soon could spot me 50 yards from the house and beat me to the gate.

I can only think I have somehow been imprinted onto the memory of this and other generations of the family because 6 years on and despite not having fed them for 6 months as I moved out recently, last week I called and a female appeared making the soft chupping noises, and came within a few feet of me. I went to the pet shop got a few worms went back and called her and she came and fed, like it had always been that way. 

For several years I could hear blackbirds in and around the park whistling the unmistakable tune I whistled,  as the family spread out in to the surrounding areas and set up new ones of their own.

I have had so much joy out of quietly and slowly building a relationship with my birds, and with all the snow this is a great time to not only look after them but also to get to know them, they never forget where they get food from so many of the birds you feed today will be with you all years....and perhaps longer.

It's out there, you just have to notice it, and through all sorts of bad times my birds always gave me pleasure, in the moment, and then as now put a smile on my face.

UPDATE

Its now 2016 and hard as it might be to believe but 7 years after moving out the new generations of blackbirds still fly over to greet me when I visit my ex. For me this proves beyond all reasonable doubt that their trust of me is genetic, it hard wired because these are individuals I have not fed on a daily basis for years.

Jon